My daughter returned to college this week after a three week holiday break. Having her home gave me a much needed vacation from her three-year-old son.

But now I am wearing the mommy/grandma hat again and dealing with a growing, inquisituve and challenging little boy. At three, he is now starting to test his limits and testing my nerves.

This means he is beginning to defy authority and assert his growing independence. Everything I've read indicates I should recognize that this is a developmental stage. Frequent eruptions and disobedience can be a sign of a strong-willed child, the experts say, and being strong-willed is not such a bad thing in today's world.

Does this also apply if the child is a black male?   Since I have never raised a boy I am going through a learning process.  Boys are wired differently, no doubt, but how different are little white boys than black boys?  Even with equal parenting skills, I am of the opinion that little black boys always seem to be at a disadvantage.

Some of my well-meaning friends don't take too kindly when I bring up race as a factor in how my grandson will be treated in the future. But when CNN does a story indictating that most employers say they would rather hire a white male who's a convicted felon over an African-American male with no criminal background, I have to wonder how my grandson's strong-willed manner will play out in society in the future.

Whether you want to admit or accept it, the playing field is not level for black males in this society, so it's up to me to make sure that strong will my grandson exhibits now, will be something positive and powerful in his future.